fidgeting
I've never been much of an outdoors guy, but my entire life I've had trouble sitting still in my seat.
When I was a kid, I used to tap my pen or jiggle my leg when I was in class. That got me singled out and chastised in front of the class more times than I can remember. That did not help me learn how to sit still, or how to focus my attention without being able to move my body. All it did was make me more prone to daydreaming.
I look forward to going on my walks in the evening, after I've finished with my coding and my journaling and my studying and whatever else I've been doing when everyone else is at work. Lately I've been going out later and later; partly due to my sleep schedule being screwed up, and partly because I've come to realize that I'm more comfortable when the sun is down and there are fewer people on the road. Trying to negotiate traffic on foot when everyone is rushing during the day is not ideal.
Changing my URL and my theme and my focus definitely feels like a form of fidgeting. Because I don't get up and move around enough, I start to feel stagnant. So to combat that, I've told myself I don't get to publish the post until after I've gone for a walk. If I don't leave the house that day, then there's no point in posting. The whole point of deleting Reddit was so that I would not be around people who are figuratively chained to their keyboards all day. There's enough noise on the Internet without subjecting myself to ceaseless amounts of it.
But I have to stick to one (1) URL and one (1) theme, and if I have to stick to something then I want it to be something consistent. Because I don't have a digital camera or a smartphone, the only record of my having left the house are going to be my words. And the time of day I want to blog is at night, not during the middle of it when I'm meant to be focused on something else.
I'm overthinking this. This is why I would advise against deleting and restarting a blog over and over. Stick to one. Done too many times, the last person I have to explain myself to is myself. And maybe the three people who recognize my writing style or my bizarre combination of age and FFXIV fixation.
Anyway, I'm back-dating this so it doesn't show up in the Discover feed, and I'll be back after I've gone for a walk.